Crazy Fanfic Writer, Crazy Femme, Crazy, Crazy, Crazy...

Normally when I put song lyrics in a blog post, I put them at the end of the entry. Today, however, they're going at the beginning, just because they seem to sum up how I've been feeling lately.

I remember when
I remember, I remember when I lost my mind
There was something so pleasant about that place
Even your emotions had an echo
In so much space

And when you're out there
Without care, yeah, I was out of touch
But it wasn't because I didn't know enough
I just knew too much

Does that make me crazy?
Does that make me crazy?
Does that make me crazy?
Possibly

Thanks, Gnarls Barkley, for saying it for me.

Indeed, life has become crazy. I'm helping to fight a war against who-knows-how-many supervillians, dating a former Dark Lord, and allowing the oddest collection of weirdos this side of Animal House to live on my property. I have a mini-dragon as a pet, a bustling medical center in the barn, a medical condition that caused me to turn into a horse once a month, and friends all over the planet who had similar issues on their respective properties. This war had turned my entire life upside down and topsy-turvy.

And I don't give a rip. Because when you realize you've gone crazy, you find an odd sense of serenity in that knowledge.

These were my thoughts earlier this evening as I sat on Rose's couch, watching Stranger Than Fiction with Vader, Rose, and a handful of Transformers who had nothing better to do. I'm getting better at recognizing these guys by sight, though I'm still getting the "coneheads" -- Thrust, Dirge, and Ramjet -- mixed up on a regular basis. For some reason Megatron finds this hilarious.

I'd seen this movie before (and really liked it despite not being a Will Ferril fan), but for some reason tonight I couldn't sit through it. Maybe because of the theme it dealt with -- what a person does when they're faced with the knowledge that their death is imminent. Or maybe I'd just had enough of people for the day. At any rate, I got up from the couch.

"I'm going to take a walk," I announced.

"Take a bodyguard," ordered Vader.

"Prime, all right if I steal Jazz?"

"Not a problem," he assured me, and the black-and-white mech got up from the floor and followed me outside.

Outside I walked out past the landing field, past the sleeping dragons of Will's company and the azure hulk of Saphira. Finding a spot of clear ground, I lay down and folded my arms behind my head, gazing up into the sky.

"Somethin' eatin' at ya, Kenya?" asked Jazz, laying down beside me in a similar pose.

I sighed. "I just feel that there's something more I can be doing," I told him. "That I SHOULD be doing. It doesn't feel right that I'm sitting around vegging here while elsewhere Voldemort and Galbatorix and Nemesis and who-knows-what-else is out gathering power or forces or whatever it is they need."

"Girl, there ain't a lot you or anyone else can do at this point," Jazz informed me. "Until we get more info on what's goin' on at Babylon Palace, there ain't a lot any of us can do. 'Cept sit tight and help each other out as much as we can."

I sigh again. "I know that's all we can do at this point. Doesn't mean I have to like it..."

Something rustles close by, and both of us sit up in a flash, guns drawn. Call us paranoid, I guess, but better paranoid than ambushed...

General Grievous stepped into view, arms raised. "Put them down already!"

"Don't sneak up on a mech like that," Jazz advised, lowering his gun.

"What's up?" I asked. "Any improvement on the home front?"

"No, and that's why I'm here," Grievous replied. "The comm line's down; we weren't able to raise you on the horn."

"The line's down?"

"That's what I said. Seems someone took out the communication relays." He gave me a serious look. "And Delta's gone."

I blinked. "What?"

"Delta's gone!" he repeated angrily. "How many times do I have to say it? This afternoon a black and gray semi truck stopped on the road in front of your house and just stayed there awhile. We sent troops out to check it out, but it took off before they could reach it. Delta went nuts and chased after it, and she hasn't come back."

"Oh no," I moaned. "She didn't try going off after Nemesis by herself, please don't tell me that!"

"It looks like that's the case," Grievous informed me. "Drache sent a party of troops to track them, but they haven't been able to pinpoint their exact locations yet."

I buried my face in my hands. As if things couldn't get any crazier...

"Come inside," Jazz invited Grievous. "You'd better report to Prime on this."

All I can say is Delta had better come home in one piece. Or else Nemesis is going to be hurting hard by the time my live-in crew and I are done with him.